The art of rephrasing to better understand others
Listening isn’t just about staying silent.
It’s about trying to understand.
And sometimes, to get there, you need to rephrase.
Rephrasing means putting what the other person said into your own words.
It’s a simple, yet powerful gesture.
A way to say: “I’m here. What you’re going through matters to me.”
Why Rephrase?
To confirm your understanding
“If I understand correctly, you feel stuck between two choices…”
You’re checking: Did I get what you meant?
To show the other person they’ve been heard
It may seem small… but it changes everything.
When someone senses that you’re truly listening, they relax. They open up.
To help them clarify what they’re feeling
Hearing their own thoughts reflected in your words can spark insight.
It helps them better understand themselves.
Keys to effective rephrasing
1. Stay true to the speaker’s intention
Don’t try to summarize or interpret.
Your role is to reflect what they’re trying to express — with care and accuracy.
2. Use open-ended phrasing
Offer, rather than impose:
“Are you saying that…?”
“It sounds like you’re feeling…”
3. Avoid bringing it back to yourself
Rephrasing isn’t about sharing your own story.
It’s about staying fully centered on the other person.
4. Use a kind, respectful tone
Even if you’re reflecting a discomfort or strong emotion, stay calm and compassionate.
Your tone matters just as much as your words.
A practice that transforms your conversations
Rephrasing won’t make a conversation perfect, but it will make it more human, more clear, more real. And it’s not just for professionals, you can use it in all your relationships.
At Tel-Aide Montréal, rephrasing is a cornerstone of our active listening.
Not to control the dialogue — but to make sure the other person feels heard, respected, and welcomed.
Because better understanding others often helps them better understand themselves. And sometimes, one well-rephrased sentence can open a real conversation.
